Shaken, not stirred . . .

If you were trying to get a hold of me around 1:00am last night, I'm sorry, but I was busy surviving an earthquake.

Don't worry, I'm ok.

See, an earthquake - for those who are unfamiliar with the concept - is when the ground decides to move violently even if you are trying to go to sleep. For example: Last night I was trying to sleep when my bed began vibrating back and forth (the long way) as if I had put or quarter (or perhaps 25 pence) in a vibrating bed of a cheep motel room. If I was in a cheep motel room and had actually put 25p in the bed I would have thought it was broken by not moving, but since the ground was moving they probably would have canceled each other out.

The odd movements disturbed my very core as if my soul were trying to escape from my chest. So many thoughts raced through my head:

"Is my room haunted?"
"Is the 1989 film "Little Monsters" starting Fred Savage not an entertaining piece of cinema, but Fred's warning that monsters actually do come out from under your bed at night?"
"Is this God punishing me for sleeping in the buff?"

It turns out that it wasn't my soul drifting from my body, but two plate tectonics were drifting apart (or maybe together) right below me, deep beneath the English soil. The quake registered 5.2 on the Richter scale which is an exponential scale. This means that my night was exponentially more scary than your night.

Up until 5 minutes ago I didn't even know what had happened, but my colleague, Sabina, from New Zealand, where apparently earthquakes are "no big deal," told me what danger I had survived. I now remain shaken (quite literally) but not stirred. If my room is haunted, if Fred Savage is hiding under my bed, or if God wants me to sleep in trousers; I can take it. After all, I am an earthquake survivor.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/7266136.stm